Loving God Archives | Page 17 of 39

April 12, 2017March 3, 2022

Day 10: Bad Couples Therapy

Dr. William Doherty wrote, “the only form of therapy that received low ratings in a famous national survey of therapy clients, published in 1996 by Consumer Reports, was couples therapy” (see Bad Couples Therapy in Psychotherapy Networker).

He proposed that this problem exists because psychologists, social workers, professional counselors, and psychiatrists have never had even one course in how to conduct marital therapy.

His Bottom Line on Bad Couples Therapy:

Most therapists don’t know what they’re doing and need training.

I was one of the Blessed Ones, I guess. I completed a full semester (elective) course in marital therapy while I was in graduate school. And I did a couple’s Case Study as part of my Professional Qualifying Exam prior to my pre-doctoral internship.

And when I decided to specialize in couples counseling, I read everything I could find about how to do marital therapy well. I took post-graduate courses and even completed a 4-day externship in Houston, Texas.

But as I began to practice, I realized all my training had left out the Key Principles.

Unfortunately, marriage counseling often fails
– simply because it is founded upon the wrong premises.

Here are a few examples …

Marriage is a 50-50 partnership.
Romance dies a natural, healthy death.
There are no God-given gender differences.
Men need to learn to express themselves like women do.
And we don’t talk about God or spiritual warfare. That’s for preachers.

And here’s my take …

Marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman before God.
God is the Original Romantic, and Romance is what keeps us going.
We have many God-given gender differences to be acknowledged and respected.
Men do not need to become like women in order to have a happy, healthy marriage.
Relationships are – first and foremost – spiritual endeavors. Ignore that, and you lose.

And that’s exactly why I spend so my time talking with you about your spirituality. Without God, you’re fighting a tougher battle than you need to fight. Here’s a short article that you might find helpful: Inside, Outside, Upside Down.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

How do you see the current issues you have in your relationship?
What approaches have you already tried to improve things?
Have you asked God for His perspective?
What did He say?

April 11, 2017April 11, 2017

We say, “Yes!”

How can I write all that it is to be growing with You, Heavenly Father? You are too Marvelous for words. And yet words are creative. Bringing fruit to the Earth. You create by speaking. And so do we.

You have pulled back the curtain so we can see Your plan for our lives. We want to see Your Majesty. Your Power. Bring Heaven to Earth through Your Holy Spirit at work in us. We overcome the evil that is at work in the world every time we confess Your Goodness.

We say “Yes!” to Your Lordship. We choose You. As You have chosen us. We surrender happily to Your will. We are Your creation, designed to do good works.

Rise up within us. Empower us by Your Grace
to be a Blessing to those around us.

Let it be so this day. Amen.

April 9, 2017March 3, 2022

Day 7: In the Beginning

God creates the Heavens and the Earth – from Nothing. You and I can’t imagine Nothing. For us, there has always been Something. Scientists claim they’ve figured out how to make Something out of Nothing. However, they need a lot of special equipment to get it done.

[callout]God doesn’t need any special equipment.
He just says, “Let there be.” And there is![/callout]

For instance, He says, “Let there be light.”
And suddenly there is … both light and darkness.
That is, Day and Night. Day One. He’s pleased with His work.

On Day Two, His “Let there be” separates Sky from Water.
So far, so good. That’s how He sees it.

On Day Three, He really gets busy with Land and Seas, and Plants and Trees.
All come into being at the sound of His voice. And He sees again that it’s all good.

Day Four brings Sun, Moon, and Stars. So far, still good.
He’s setting the stage for Romance now, don’t you think?

Day Five comes with Sea Creatures and Winged Birds. All good, of course.
But this time, the Lord gives a blessing and instructions to what He has created.

God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and increase in number
and fill the water in the seas,
and let the birds increase on the earth.”
(Genesis 1:22)

On Day Six He creates Land Animals. Of course, He saves His Best for last.
He creates Man and Woman in His Image – to rule over the Fish and the Birds,
the Animals and the Creepy Crawlers.
And He gives them Plenty to eat.

God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number;
fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky
and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”
(Genesis 1:28)

Are you beginning to see a pattern when God creates?

The Lord blesses us, commands fruitfulness, and expects us to increase.
Plus, He gives man dominion over Creation. All of Creation!

This is where the Story gets really good. I love the way the Lord shows us more detail about just how He creates Adam. He tells us man is formed from the dust of the ground, and that God Himself breathes into Adam the Breath of Life.

Then He sets the man down – smack in the middle of Eden – with enjoyable and fruitful work to do (pun intended). Adam is now the Resident Gardener with amazing freedom. He can eat anything he wants … except the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil.

That sounds easy enough, yes?
I’m sure Adam thought so, too.

Now we get to the really good part.
Well, it’s actually the no-so-good part.

That is, what is not-so-good at that point
– compared to everything else,
which is good – is that Adam is alone.

[callout]Adam needs his own Someone.[/callout]

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

What assumptions might we make about men based on the Story of Creation?
How is the Biblical account relevant to where we are today as a society?
What might it mean for you and the one you love?