Women want a happier marriage. We need to be loved. Wanted. Accepted. But so many issues can get in the way. Mostly our beliefs about people. Including ourselves. We have a lot of old untruths to unlearn. And many wonderful truths to learn.
Women have more power than we think.
However, we need to learn how to use our power wisely. Every woman has the God-given ability to inspire, influence, & invite her man into a deeper experience of life & love.
Unfortunately, most of us (myself included) have misunderstood how that works, and ended up doing more harm than good … just like Eve did when she believed the serpent’s lie in the Garden of Eden.
But we face two major challenges:
- What we don’t know.
- What we do know that actually isn’t true.
I’ve had my own struggles with men. Abandoned by my father when I was a toddler & rejected by my husband as a young wife.
For a long time, I believed being abandoned & rejected was my fault.
It wasn’t.
Subsequent interactions with the opposite sex helped me realize the power of my influence.
And at the age of 40, I reconnected with my father … soon after I began my journey toward becoming a psychologist.
I also spent a lot of time working on my self-confidence … and learning how women affect men in everyday life, as well as in romance.
Today, after more than 20 years of experience working with couples & individuals, as well as training professional & lay counselors, I realize that the biggest, most common challenges women face are caused by misinformation about …
- who we are as women,
- how the opposite sex operates, and
- what God wants our marriages to be.
You don’t need a graduate degree to learn what I’ve learned.
Yes, I am a Clinical Psychologist & a former Psychology Professor.
Although it’s not how I was trained as a counselor in grad school, I’ve never been able to resist blending the two roles.
Because I have always been a teacher … with all my heart & soul.
Why wouldn’t I want share what research reveals about the best ways to create & sustain a love-filled life?
Now I’m here to help you create & enjoy the relationship you want … whether or not your spouse is involved in the learning process.
I say that because I know many men don’t want to go to couple’s counseling.
I am NOT saying women are solely responsible for the health of a marriage!
I was there once upon a time myself. Remember? I wasn’t a psychologist back then, but I read every book I could get my hands on. None of them provided the help I needed. I had to discover that on my own. And I did.
No, you’re not totally responsible for fixing all the difficulties in your marriage. A marriage always takes two.
But you do have a choice.
You get to choose whether or not you’re okay with your marriage as it is. You can choose to learn how to turn things around – together as a couple or – as an individual, if necessary.
When you step into the learning process – alone or with your husband, there’s a lot to gain … for both of you.
This choice is yours.
… I have set before you life & death, blessings & curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life …
Deuteronomy 30:19b-20a
An Alternative to Couple’s Counseling
- Not everyone can afford professional counseling. Fortunately, not everyone needs professional counseling.
- Furthermore, since March of 2020, most people have been working from home & began homeschooling their kids as well. Talk about stress!!!
- So finding time to drive to counseling sessions has been a ginormous challenge – even though marriage help is needed now more than ever.
That’s why I developed Personal Learning Programs for a Happier Marriage.
Personal Learning Programs give you the privacy of individual, couple, or closed-group formats, without many of its disadvantages.
Professional Counseling is often costly & open-ended.
You may wonder where you’re heading & how long it will take to get there.
- However, all my Personal Learning Programs are prepaid & time-limited. And the goals of each are clear, so you know in advance what to expect.
- And unlike Professional Counseling, you will have weekly assignments & experiments to help you learn & apply new information in real life between sessions. Get more for your time & money.
- Weekly lessons are scheduled at a mutually convenient time in a private Zoom Room. So you won’t have to be in the same location … or the same country!
What You Can Expect From Each Program
Clearly Defined Goals
Otherwise known as course objectives that are stated before you begin.
Weekly Assignments
To make the most of your personal time online with me, you will need to read the text, watch relevant videos, & do the experiments (if assigned) before we meet.
Personal Instruction
I will provide a brief outline at the beginning of each lesson, highlighting the key points to be covered. So be sure to have pen & paper ready.
Discussion
Most of your lesson time will be devoted to clarification & to answering your questions about how this week’s information applies in real life.
Feedback
I always want to know if what we’ve covered seems relevant to where you are in life & love. If we need to adjust the learning to fit you style, now is the time to know! So you will be invited to tell me what you think at the end of each lesson.
Assignments & Experiments
You will be given the next week’s reading assignment & a description of the experiments you can try in real life. After all, if it doesn’t make a real-life difference, what’s the point?
Next Steps
If you wish to continue after your Program ends, you will have the opportunity to enroll in an additional Program at a discount. Or you can choose to followup with another brief lesson (or two) for an additional fee.
What Programs do you offer?
I currently offer 3 educational Programs.
Read the descriptions below, then schedule your free 30-minute video consultation to make sure we’ve got the right Program for you.
The information provided in each Program is for educational purposes only. It is not intended to replace a professional evaluation or treatment for emotional and relational concerns.
NOTE: If you are experiencing severe distress or believe you may be a victim of domestic violence, please contact a licensed mental health professional in your state or country for assistance. If you are experiencing a life-threatening emergency, please call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room.
A Woman’s Quick Start Guide to Understanding Men
Description. This is a great opportunity to explore the 7 essentials that every woman needs to know about the man she loves: what he thinks, how he feels, and why he does the things he does.
He will make a lot more sense to you after you complete this course.
Objectives. After completing this Program, participants will be able to explain a man’s:
- Uncertainty
- Sensitivities
- Rules for Manhood
- Divine Purpose
- Normal Language
- Ability to Upgrade
- Leadership
Individual Registration Fee: $499
Black Friday Sale Price: $299
Program Registration Includes:
- Primary Text: Quick Start Guide to Understanding Men (digital workbook)
- 6 Personal Lessons (60 minutes each) via Zoom
NOTE: This course is also available as an Independent Study. Click here to enroll in the independent study. Schedule your free consultation if you’re interested in a Closed (Private) Group with up to 4 of your friends.
Ephesians 5 Romance: the Truth about Love
Description. From the Book of Genesis to Paul’s letter to the Ephesians to what’s happening in your own marriage today, learn to make sense of your God-given gender differences. And practical ways to create a marriage that’s Better Than Eden.
Objectives. After completing this Program, participants will be able to:
- identify your emotional & relational differences
- talk about your faith journey
- identify attachment patterns
- discuss the beauty of a feminine perspective
- discuss the wonder of a male perspective
- improve male-female communication patterns
- identify what’s most important & ways to love & honor one another
Couple Registration Fee: $599
Black Friday Sale Price: $499
Program Registration Includes:
- Primary Text: Ephesians 5 Romance (softcover edition)
- Online Couple Evaluation (Prepare-Enrich Inventory)
- 7 Personal Lessons (60 minutes each) via Zoom
NOTE: If you prefer to study this material on your own, order Ephesians 5 Romance (digital or softcover book) on Amazon.
Your love story matters. It matters because it belongs to you. It’s what you know and where you live. Mostly, it matters to God.
What happened to you growing up matters because it’s how you learned about Life and Love. Some of what you learned is true.
Some isn’t.
That’s what this book is about.
As a Psychologist, Dr. Debi Smith teaches us exactly how and why the Apostle Paul’s instructions work in favor of both sexes who want a Blessed Romance.
Enjoy a delightfully casual and hopeful conversation about the Psychology of Men and Romance, filled with:
* biblical understanding
* research-based principles
* applicable skillsYou’re going to love it!
Amazon Book Description
How to Resolve Couple Conflict
Description. Resolve conflict, break the negative cycle, & create connection. This method structured method is based on research findings + more than 20 years experience working with couples & training counselors.
Objectives. After completing this Program, participants will be able to:
- identify your communication errors
- recognize & understand your personal communication patterns
- define your negative couple cycle
- outline the steps needed to break your negative cycle
- describe ways that you can create connection
Couple Registration Fee: $299
Black Friday Sale Price: $199
Program Registration Includes:
- Primary Text: How to Resolve Couple Conflict (digital workbook)
- 4 Personal Lessons (60 minutes each) via Zoom
NOTE: This course is also available as an Independent Study. Click here to enroll in the independent study.
How to Get Started toward a Happier Marriage
Request your free 30-minute video consultation here.
There is no obligation to continue if the Personal Learning Program is not a good fit for you. And if it seems appropriate, I will be happy to provide you will a list of referrals for professional counseling.
Thanks for your blog, nice to read. Do not stop.
Thanks, Mark. I will keep writing.